My Girl Em

I say this all the time but....

I always tell people that I chose to teach English

because literature holds a power within us.

It is this power that always helps me come to terms 

with life,

with struggles,

with my mind's worries.

Take this for example:

I grew up in a religious home

--not that strictly religious

but we went to church

every Sunday

and I came to BYU 

and went to church 

every Sunday

and that didn't resonate with me 

and my typical BYU self that couldn't let go

now excuse me and forgive me and I understand. 

This may seem a bit blasphemous to some. 

I know. My mom tells me every single Sunday. 

But it is kind of a big deal for me. 

I came to BYU 

to get a degree

....to get married

to have my testimony built and strengthened

and all of those magical things 

and interestingly enough

I got this Emily Dickinson poem. 

Some keep the Sabbath going to Church –
I keep it, staying at Home –
With a Bobolink for a Chorister –
And an Orchard, for a Dome – 

Some keep the Sabbath in Surplice –
I, just wear my Wings –
And instead of tolling the Bell, for Church,
Our little Sexton – sings. 

God preaches, a noted Clergyman –
And the sermon is never long,
So instead of getting to Heaven, at last –
I’m going, all along.

Despite what I was probably supposed to get with my church school experience 

I got Emily Dickinson's metaphors. 

She brought together my two worlds 

To fix my soul torn in half.

I can experience everything 

Without the traditional structure

But as I feel right for me.

I got Emily Dickinson's simple language. 

She stated things matter of fact

To smooth my confused wants.

I can live without all the constructs 

And still be a good person

It's that simple

I got Emily Dickinson's dashes

She let things out and pushed things aside 

To show me it is okay to let go. 

I can let go.

I can choose to do what works

And everything else doesn't matter.  

I got all of these things

and I got the satisfaction of knowing

the exact thing I needed

to satisfy my feelings at that moment

through the power of literature

to open my eyes beyond the limits

of things that seem so small. 

all seemingly so simple.

yet so impacting to my life. 

and that's the awe.

the power. the bond. the peace. 

the simplicity.